Yelling at Bananas in Whole Foods

In Yelling at Bananas in Whole Foods, Dan embarks on an epic journey to radically change his relationship with the food he consumes after a chance meeting with a famed 1990s health guru at a smoothie shack in Taos, New Mexico. But will his journey into the rabbit hole of the future of food, the effects of food, and on and on, turn into a militant obsession that isolates him from all of humankind?


The first workshop run of Yelling at Bananas in Whole Foods was in July 2012 at The Berkshire Fringe in Great Barrington, Massachusetts. It was directed by Paul Takacs.

The play was reworked, and it received its world premiere in August 2013 at the Minnesota Fringe Festival. It later was performed to sold-out houses in Indianapolis. 2014 brought it to New York City and Brooklyn. 


BEST OF THE FEST ... harsh and funny and unforgettably absurd
— Minneapolis City Pages
MUST SEE ... a terrific, natural monologist
— St. Paul Pioneer Press
★★★★½ — In his latest monologue, Bernitt, one of the most fully engaging performers you’ll see at the Fringe, details his journey from a desolate New Mexico artist colony to a public breakdown in a NYC Whole Foods. While some of his life experiences are more unusual than most and make for a great story in and of themselves, it’s Bernitt’s ability to fantastically describe ordinary details that take his writing a step above most. He could easily leave behind the world of theatre and follow in the footsteps of David Sedaris or Augusten Burroughs. And like those authors, he isn’t afraid to share the details that make him look less favorable, including the aftermath of a one-night stand gone wrong and phone call confessionals with his mother.
— Indianapolis Nuvo
alternately thoughtful and disquieting, outlandishly funny and often frightening
— Berkshire Bright Focus